


Pseudo Tempo

by egirlpiss



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst, F/M, Fix-It, Happy Ending, Healing, Humor, IT'S WHAT THEY DESERVED, LGBTQ Character, Lotura - Freeform, Pansexual Lotor, Slow Burn, Suggestive Themes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 12:19:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17203286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/egirlpiss/pseuds/egirlpiss
Summary: Soon following a certain prince's miraculous recovery from quintessence overdose, Allura is forced to come to terms with the great war's ending. Now unsure of her value to the universe, she looks to the prince to remind her of what it means to be a leader. She grapples with a flurry of emotions as she struggles to re-familiarize herself with peace, forgive wrong-doings and do her royal duty as her coronation hastily approaches.





	Pseudo Tempo

**Author's Note:**

> for all the lotor stans

Ever since the incident, Allura had patiently sat beside the cryo-replenisher, a hand permanently hovering over the cold glass restricting her from Lotor’s paled skin. She hadn’t eaten properly, slept, or talked to anybody in quintants. How could she? Her body was wracked with an unquenchable guilt, filling every crevice so that there was no room left for basic needs. All that was on her mind was the incident.

The smell of staling food goo was ever-prominent as it had remained at her table side for hours now, along with a glass of water. The crew had long since retired to their sleeping quarters after an attempt at small talk and persuading Allura to eat a little. All they could manage was to leave her with essentials, a soft blanket and a pillow. Allura took in a faint breath, finally lowering her spiritless hand from Lotor’s container. The exhaustion was beginning to creep up on her. Her eyes were heavy with drowsiness, and she couldn’t help but lean back against the pillow on her chair, pulling the blanket up to her chin. She could find no comfort or warmth, however. Such sensations were fruitless; they were ineffective in restoring the damaged man before her. Only time could heal him now.

The patience required...it was purely agonizing, yet she had ran out of tears to cry. After the echo of her final sob, the only sound remaining was the humming of electricity. It had been that way for hours.

She searched Lotor’s face for any sign of stirring before sighing shakily, her bloodshot eyes stinging as they threatened to spill more nonexistent tears. It was then that she spoke for the first time in days. “L-Lotor, I...” Her voice was raspy and weak from lack of use. “I know it’ll never make up f-for what I’ve done but... I’m so truly sorry. Please, please, just come back to me! I beg of you!” She called out to Lotor’s immobile body, overcome with emotions once more. Burying her head into her blanket, she began to weep hoarsely in utter despair, bringing her feet up onto the chair and hugging herself.

It was as if fate had plans for Allura and Lotor that night. With a dazzling flash of blue and a whir, the barrier separating the two faded. Caught off guard, Allura glanced up from her resting place to find a lean purple man falling towards her. She barely had time to squawk before he had collapsed on top of her, knocking her from her chair and leaving them in a tangled heap on the floor.

Allura groaned in pain and discomfort but was quick to react to the situation, rolling Lotor’s limp, frosty body from off of her and onto his back. Getting to her knees, she clutched Lotor’s hand desperately. “Oh, oh, you’re alive, oh thank goodness, I-I thought I’d never see you again...I thought you were going to die...I waited for s-s-so long...” She whimpered through raggedy sobs, stroking Lotor’s cheek with her free hand tenderly. His sapphire eyes blinked, a weary but puzzled expression passing over his angular visage.

“I... Where..?”

“We’re in the medical wing, Lotor...everything is going to be alright now. We can fix this, I know we can,” Allura responded almost immediately, her voice cracking as she was overwhelmed by a vortex of feelings. Lotor grunted softly as he raised himself with his palms, struggling to sit up even with Allura’s assistance. His chest rose and fell with slow but heavy breaths as he took in his surroundings, brushing his hand against the tiled floor. Then, at last, he met Allura’s gaze.

“Allura...”

As soon as the recognition settled, so too did his body. Relief flushed throughout him and he took the princess into his strong arms, cradling her as if he never wanted to let go. Allura gasped almost silently, her eyes of sky blue widening in surprise. Shakily, she reached up to clutch the fabric at his chest, resting her head against his torso. “Yes...it is me. I was so awfully worried about you...”

“Allura...” Lotor’s arms coiled a little more tightly around her.

“Lotor...”

“Princess.” They tightened again.

“...Lotor?” Something wasn’t right. Tension made its swift return to Lotor’s body, and a trembling accompanied it. Allura sensed a nervous energy repelling her from Lotor as if they were two negative magnets trapped in embrace. Listening to her instincts, she cautiously pulled herself away from him, a frown quick to return to her face as she gazed upon his own.

Cold, bleak, and somber was the countenance she was greeted with. His eyes were impenetrable, as if they held no happiness and knew no peace. Her fingers clinging on his shirt loosened as concern for the other struck her like freezing water. “Are you alright? Did I hurt you?”

There was only silence...at least momentarily, until the prince pushed Allura off of him with just enough force to convey his then realized anger. He stumbled to his feet with a frustrated groan, holding the table for support and panting softly while glaring daggers at Allura. Bewildered by this revelation, Allura’s brow only furrowed further, her lips parting slightly in increasing offence.

“Yes. You did,” came the now bitter response of Lotor. It only startled Allura further.

“But, Lotor—“

“But, _Princess_ ,” he spat back mockingly, clenching his jaw as he dug his fingers into the table. “Did you believe those events would simply slip my mind? That I would awaken and immediately forgive you? Oh, sweet princess...you are _indeed_ one to romanticize.” The harsh, icy words sliced Allura’s fragile soul into ribbons.

Dismayed, she stood, her hands in fists at her side. “I was never asking for your forgiveness. You should be asking for _mine._ My only desire was that you be safe, nothing more!”

Lotor raised an unimpressed eyebrow, steadying himself against the table. He swigged back the glass of water as if he were parched before he made his next provoking remark, throwing the empty glass at Allura’s feet. “Your naivete is evident, Your Highness. You really know nothing of my intentions; you know nothing of _me_. You dare compare me to that monster Zarkon? Then mourn for me like I meant something to you?!”

Furious tears began well in Allura’s eyes as her body shook with suppressed rage, her nails digging into her skin. “I said what I had to say in order for you to realize the severity of what you did to our people! You killed _thousands_ of innocent Alteans! Do you not understand?! Despite our clash, we rescued you from certain death. You should be indebted to us!”

“Sacrificing their lives was the only way to save billions more. They were noble heroes, and shall always be remembered as such. By agreeing to extract their extraordinary quintessence, I freed them all! But, now I—...”

While Lotor had been distracted giving his own argument, Allura had swiftly grabbed the empty glass from the floor, aiming to throw it right at the prince in a fit of anger. At the sight of this, he seemed to relax eerily, and his voice trailed off. He stared intensely into her eyes, tightening his lips as if he were silently bracing himself. Although Allura wanted nothing but to knock the other unconscious like she had the first time, her body would not obey her. She was frozen in position, glowering at Lotor with darkening eyes. With unchecked frustration bubbling in her chest, she clenched her teeth with a grunt and suddenly crushed the glass in her hand, shards raining to the floor. She could not do it. She couldn’t hurt the man she used to love.

Only left with a sense of shame and an unbearable weight on her shoulders, she spun on her heel, pacing towards the exit. It was only then that she became aware of the painful throbbing of her head. “I apologize for wasting your time, Lotor. Perhaps in another reality things would be different...but not here. Not now. So please leave; get out of my castle,” she muttered faintly, leaning against the door frame as she rubbed her temples with her fingers. Her vision was becoming blurred...was it stress?

Lotor approached from behind, hissing his words dejectedly through barely parted lips. “If that is what you truly desire, then...it may have been simpler to abandon me in The Rift to decay.”

Allura couldn’t find the strength in her to reply, however. She groaned softly, her body succumbing to gravity. She had to grip a stunned Lotor’s shoulder in order to keep herself from falling in a heap on the floor.

“...Princess, what is the matter?”

Her world was spinning; it was whirling together into nauseating blotches of color.

“Princess?”

Spiraling.

“ _Allura?!_ ”

Then nothingness.

 

* * *

 

Many hours had passed before Allura finally stirred, the soothing aroma of lavender becoming increasingly prominent as she returned to the realm of consciousness. Her eyelids reluctantly parted, welcoming beams of dazzling light through them. She moaned softly, shielding her eyes and stretching her stiff legs. She could barely recollect the events that had transpired; everything was a blur.

“P-Princess? How are you feeling?” A familiar voice rung out from somewhere beside her. She reached for the source, her hand coming into contact with a soft, pale blue linen sleeve. Her aquamarine eyes followed the fabric up the the face of its owner.

“ _Romelle_ , I...I’m so happy to see you!” Allura wheezed in relief at the sight of the blonde Altean’s kind, heart-shaped face. “What happened to me?”

Romelle rested her palm comfortingly on the quilt above Allura’s shoulder, giggling at the princess endearingly. “Oh, it was absolute madness. My slumber was disrupted by a frantic banging on my door...When I opened it, lo and behold, a perfectly responsive but panicked Lotor was crouched there with you unconscious in his arms!” Romelle frowned sternly all of a sudden, shaking her head in disapproval. “I wanted to react explosively, to give him what he deserved for all his wrongdoings, but...seeing you both like that...” Romelle faltered, her words trailing into pools of nonsensical mumbles.

“You couldn’t hurt him,” Allura finished calmly, sympathy etching itself into her already-soft features. She propped a pillow up against the frame of Romelle’s bed to lean on, then reaching to hold Romelle’s shaky hand reassuringly. “You did the right thing, Romelle.”

Romelle sniffled, wiping her eyes before regaining her composure and clearing her throat to speak clearly to the princess. “We agreed that malnutrition was to blame and rushed you into my bed. We have been here for only a few vargas. I have been watching over you to ensure your safety and to make sure you eat and groom yourself as soon as you are able.”

"I wouldn’t expect anything less from my royal adviser. But what of Lotor?”

Romelle sighed in response to the question, her amethyst eyes glancing away sheepishly. “...He disappeared shortly after resting you in bed. I had no idea of his whereabouts until a little later. Lance sought me out this morning and he informed me that Lotor had found him and demanded to be held captive within the castle. He had refused to leave, even with our intentions to peacefully spare him as long as he never returned. As a result, he was cuffed and imprisoned again. That’s all I know.”

Confusion blossomed on Allura’s face like a flower, and she stared at her lap as if she would find the answers she was seeking in the folds of the blanket. “Why wouldn’t he leave? What is he planning?” She pondered aloud, her lips tightening in concentration. Her train of thought was quickly interrupted, however.

“That is something we can worry about after you’ve eaten and cleaned yourself up, Princess. Your body is tired. As a matter of fact, I’ve had a small vacation scheduled for you on Earth for your recovery. It’ll be as long as you need, but we can’t allow you to fully operate the castle until you are physically and emotionally prepared. The last phoeb or so has taken a dramatic toll on your well-being, and so—“

“I beg your pardon?!” Allura sat upright, her eyes wild with frenzy as she stared unblinking into Romelle’s eyes. “Romelle, this is war! I cannot simply stand aside while the rest of the universe sacrifices itself in my place! Besides, only I can operate the Castle of Lions’ teludav.”

Romelle fell silent for a few second, her face clearly falling. Although she had expected such a reaction, the level of disappointment was still disheartening. Finally, with newfound strength in her voice, she spoke once more. “The tide of the war is turning, Princess. A third of the entire known universe is on our side and it grows by the second. Meanwhile, the Galra Empire is crumbling in on itself without an Emperor. The war is nigh over, Princess. The Kral Zera was destroyed, Haggar was killed and Lotor is safely confined. You can rest now.”

Allura hadn’t considered that. For years she had only known war and suffering, yet she continued to endure. A challenge had never succeeded in swaying her determination. Saving Lotor in The Rift was one of many risks that came perilously close to destroying the lives of all the paladins, including herself. She just could not bring herself to give up on somebody with good still left in their heart. If she had done everything in her power to do and ultimately saved every dimension in space and time...why was her heart sinking?

Her shoulders drooped, her expression darkening. “So that’s it...”

“For you, Princess, yes. We need you safe and sound as the paladins clean-up the last few scraps and continue rescue efforts. Afterwards you are due to return to the new Altean colony and rule as their queen.” Romelle gazed upon the princess solemnly before affectionately brushing a stray lock of her pearly white hair behind her ear. “I shall run your bath now, alright? Please eat while you wait.” With that said, Romelle rose from the edge of the bed, striding to her personal suite to prepare the bath.

Allura remained silent, the sinking of her self-worth weighing on her shoulders. Could she really return to the livelihood of true royalty after such devotion to protecting the universe? Was she even befitting of such a role in this state of mind? Taking the plate of food goo from the bedside table, she balanced it on her lap. Then carefully spooning the substance into her mouth, she swallowed it as a new, unprompted notion began to steadily formulate within her mind.

‘There is only one person I know who has the power to give me courage without fail. If anyone can remind me of my worth, he can. Perhaps there is still hope for him yet...’

 

* * *

 

 

After a rather soothing and much deserved bubble bath, Allura, donning her ever-elegant gown, glided through the castleship’s halls towards the Bastille. Rejuvenated and adamant in her decision, she burst through the doors to the giant room. At the very end, in a cell behind a small particle barrier, Lotor stood in his usual uniform and patiently faced her as if he had been expecting her. She gracefully approached the lilac prince with her head held high, ignoring the unnerving fact that he utterly dwarfed her.

“I take it that you have recovered,” he spoke coolly in introduction, his eyes narrowing to pierce into Allura’s own.

She did not waver however, a devious smile playing at her lips. “Prince Lotor, you seek asylum within the alliance, is that right?”

Lotor’s eyebrow visibly twitched in irritation as his interest peaked suddenly, but he was stubborn in letting it be known. Despite his grandest of efforts, he could not contain his curiosity. “Are you only here to bargain with me?” He muttered, his arms folding defensively.

“See it as more of an...opportunity that I am giving you access to in thanks for your kind treatment earlier.”

Lotor scoffed, breaking eye contact with the princess as he was clearly embarrassed by her observation.

She only continued. “As soon as peace is attained throughout the universe, there will be a coronation on New Altea, your colony. I will then become Queen of the Alteans, and I will have to ability grant you a home with your own people. On one condition.”

“That would be..?”

“You must accompany me to Earth where I will heal physically and spiritually in preparation for my duties as Queen. No weapons. You will be free to explore as you please, but you will have a tracking device and must answer my summons immediately if they’re given. If you attack anyone or destroy the device, you will not be welcome into my kingdom. Ever.”

Lotor scowled, his brows knitted in annoyance at receiving commands from someone of equal status. “That is more than one condi—“

“Do we have an agreement, Lotor?”

Lotor hesitated, lifting his chin as he squinted, scanning Allura’s face through the protective barrier of his cell for any sign of deceit or exaggeration. Arriving at the conclusion that she had genuine intentions, he cleared his throat, adjusting his collar in a pompous manner before retaliating. “Pray, tell me, what is the reason for this spontaneous decision? What do you have to gain with my presence?”

“That’s none of your concern,” Allura answered with a hint of vexation before repeating: “ This is your last chance. _Do we have an agreement?_ ”

After a momentary pause, the realization that this was the only option he had left if he were ever to achieve his dream sunk into Lotor’s gut. Reluctantly surrendering to Allura’s terms, his eyes lowered to the floor solemnly. Lotor positioned his arms to his side, bowing for the to-be Queen. “Yes, Princess.”

Satisfied by his approval, Allura smiled sincerely, clasping her hands together at her front. “ _Excellent_. I shall have us set course for Earth immediately. For now, you must remain here. I will have Hunk bring you food and water in the meantime, but we should arrive shortly.” Her voice softened as she continued. “You have my gratitude, Lotor. Truly.”

Turning away, Allura dismissed herself and breezily departed the room to set their coordinates to Earth.

Lotor’s jaw only tightened as she left, his lip drawing back as he snarled quietly to himself. “This is not for your sake,” he whispered, leaning his back against the wall behind him as he rested his eyes and delved into his imagination, his only escape from a less than favorable reality.

He breathed a bittersweet sigh, envisioning plains of thriving flowers, trickling creeks and lush, deciduous forests. Altean children splashed in the water, their parents laughing together with mirth as they watched. There was no war, or loss, or suffering. Every child was entitled to the livelihood they deserved: one of peace, innocence and plenty. Lotor’s world was one of love. He would’ve done anything in his power to see the smiles of those children just one time.

 _Anything_.

**Author's Note:**

> oh fuck i forgot about this


End file.
